Never forget that you are the protagonist of your own story
and the antagonist of someone else’s!
And a possible love interest in some other peoples! 0u0
This might just be the single most inspiration thing I have ever seen on the internet.
it’s nearly 2014, wake the fuck up people. girls don’t HAVE to shave, being gay isn’t a choice, racism is pointless, rape isn’t funny and sexism is fucking stupid.
i need to stop imagining scenarios in my head that have a -2% chance of actually happening it’s becoming a problem
CHING MOTHERFUCKING SHIH
This lady was such a badass, I can’t count the ways, but let’s try.
She got married to an already successful pirate, Zheng Yi, and took over when he died. She was crazy strict to keep an iron fist over her fleet of pirates, and the punishments for stepping out of line were brutal. If you stole or looted from a town that provided assistance or tribute to the pirate fleet, Ching would chop your fucking head off with a battle axe and dump your lifeless body in the ocean. If you stole from the pirate treasury, or she thought you were stealing from the pirate treasury, Ching would chop your fucking head off dump your lifeless body in the ocean. Raping any captured female prisoners was punishable by immediate death. Fuck, if you had consensual sex while on duty you got your head chopped off and the woman was chucked off the boat no matter where they were at. Ching wasn’t fucking around, and she wanted to make damn sure you weren’t fucking around when you should have been working.
Two years after she took over, she got so notorious for ransacking towns and taking taxes on them that she pissed off the entire Chinese government, and sent out a massive fleet to bring her in line. Most pirates probably would’ve said this was out of their pay grade and taken off to hide out or ransack some other country.
Ching Shih said fuck that.
She not only faced them head on, she wiped the floor with them, killing hundreds and capturing sixty-something ships from the Imperial Fleet. Prisoners were given the choice of joining up or being executed on the spot. The Admiral of the Chinese navy, Kwo Lang, was so afraid of being captured by her or going back to admit he’d been beaten by her that he committed suicide.
For the next two years, Ching Shih not only kept on pirating, she fought off Chinese forces as well as Dutch and British warships that the navy called in to help. Finally the government gave up and offered her amnesty as well as amnesty for her then SEVENTEEN THOUSAND crewman. Ching Shih got to keep all her plunder, so she retired to the countryside where she opened up a brothel and lived until she was 69.
tldr: I’ve come to terms with the reality that I’ll never be as terrifyingly badass as this woman was.
You know, I heard of her, but I’d either forgotten or never heard that she grew old and retired having never been brought down or defeated ever.
She won being a pirate.
She got history’s high score.
Poor Hufflepuff. Everyone who wasn’t cunning, intelligent, or brave got sent to Hufflepuff
Ding-dong, you are wrong.
Everyone who had immense amounts of courage but, when given the choice, would decide that fighting is not as important as staying put to care for the people a war leaves in its wake ended up in Hufflepuff.
Everyone who was extremely intelligent but simply considered it a much more defining characteristic to be loyal and faithful to people they love, rather than taking pride in their intelligence*, ended up in Hufflepuff.
Everyone who wanted to do something important and had enough cunning to manipulate others and wind their way to the top, but never would because they considered it more important to be honest and earn their success fairly and through hard work ended up in Hufflepuff
Everyone who was brave, and smart, and cunning, but did not consider those traits to be the most important and defining aspects of their personality ended up in Hufflepuff.
Helga Hufflepuff made a conscious decision to accept only those students who were honest and loyal and true enough to themselves to say “No. Courage and intelligence and cunning are all valuable traits, but I will not define myself by them because I believe there are things more important than that.”
We are not your fucking leftovers.
- I’ve been in a hiatus for almost half a year and I’ve just come back last month. I must say that I’ve been quite silent from my comeback. So here’s a giveaway announcing my official return from this world. This Giveaway shall be my Christmas Giveaway, too because I’m not rich. *sobs*
WHAT YOU’LL GET:
1. Harry Potter Bookset (with the new cover)- Okay, so this is why I’m giving this precious thing away. It was my birthday and I requested this to my college friends, I’ve also been talking about this bookset in front of my parents. I wasn’t expecting to actually receive this but the morning of my birthday, my parents gave me a set. When I went to school, another book set was seating on my chair from my college friends. They said I should sell it and make some body but I think that’s wrong so my friends suggested give it away to my followers. So yeah, misunderstandings
2. Quidditch Through the Years and Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them- I have another set of this, from my friend. I found these from a book sale in a school near my house. It was surprisingly cheap so I bought it.
3. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows- This is my very first DH book. It’s really tattered and precious. Inside this book are notes and facts I’ve written. There are also quotations that have been highlighted. On the blank page at the back, I’ve written a song dedicated for the end of the book.
4. House of Hades- This book has been bought by my own money. My sister and I are both fans of Riordan’s work. So when I came home with the book, I found my sister reading another copy of it which she bought, too. So I decided I should pile this gem in this giveaway too.
5. The Kane Chronicles: Survival Guide- This is a gift from my aunt. This is book from Riordan, too. I wouldn’t want to give it away but I bought a set of Riordan’s work and it also contains this book.
6. Deathly Hallows Necklace- I already have a DH necklace (it have a fancier chains). i found this at a local fashion store. It’s kind of affordable so I bought it and giving it to you.
7. HP-related Ballers- The Lumos baller glows in the dark. There will be two Gryffindor ballers both with lion engravings in different colors. The Slytherin one has a snake engraving too. These are what were left in my supplies. My friend used to distribute these so I’ve got most of these to sell.
8. A life-long friend- I’m so sorry. I put the celebrity of your choice as your friend but I don’t think my lunch money is enough. So you’re stuck with me.
9. A place in my heart, I mean my blog.
11. A Follow- I will check everyone’s blog and follow some of you too. Yay!RULES:
- Must be following moi.
- LIKES DO NOT COUNT. I’M SORRY.
- REBLOG AS MANY AS YOU WANT.
- DO NOT USE ANY PROMO BLOGS, I CAN TELL.DETAILS:
- Promo will end on December 24, 2013.
- I will message the winner on December 25, 2013. Please open your askbox.
- If the winner didn’t reply in 2 days time, another winner will be picked.
- I will use a random number generator to pick the winner.
- THE SHIPPING FEE WILL BE MY RESPONSIBILITY. WELL, MY MUM’S MONEY BUT HEY, SHE SAW ME MAKING THIS GIVEAWAY AND VOLUNTEERED TO HELP.
- Any other questions? My askbox is open.THANK YOU AND GOODLUCK!
Toothless is so cute here.
HIS NOSTRILS ARE PINK ON THE INSIDES
YOU CAN SEE THE EDGES OF HIS SCALES
HE’S STILL COVERED IN DIRT AND SOOT FROM THE FIGHT
DREAMWORKS WHY ARE YOU SO AWESOME
And the detail in his eyes is incredible.
I love how book lovers reward themselves with finishing a book by buying more books.
Sometimes we don’t even finish before buying more. We tend to congratulate our selves for buying books by buying more books.
i fucking lost it at the one about swine flu
there’s playing piano, which is difficult
there’s ragtime piano, which involves difficult techniques and at its best involves lots of improvisations on a theme
then there’s stride piano, which involves no sheet music and is fully improvised along a basic melody and chord progression
then there’s stride piano duet, which involves no sheet music and is fully improvised along a basic melody and progression AND YOU CAN’T SEE YOUR DUET PARTNER’S BODY LANGUAGE
basically this is magic
oh my god
so is it’s like “lets play and hope for the best”?
also, duct tape on your arms, a few layers, but not too tight. basically it’ll stop a zombie taking a chunk out of your arm if you’re reloading or your blade gets jammed in a zombie
wearing a wetsuit underneath your clothing would also be useful. remember; they were human once, humans have blunt teeth! you try biting through duct tape AND a wet suit
never duct tape joints, your movements will be limited, and you want to be fast and danger (gotta go fast)
don’t hole up in small houses either that’s a recipe for disaster, you want somewhere with a secure upstairs, and a way down from the upstairs that is zombie free or can easily be cleared of zombies (avoid fire exits with steps leading up to them though, unless they have gates at the bottom)
sound = attraction, so if you do have guns, use them only in emergencies or for the sake of popping one head you’ll be greeted with many many more
raid your local medical shops, and get there first, nobody is going to stop and share it out equally while they’re panicking. don’t hit out at somebody unless they hit out at you, though, you already have unintelligent corpses pitted against you, you don’t want sentient humans on your case as well (zombies don’t do the revenge thing, humans do!)
try not to piss people off, because as stated before, yes, humans like revenge
don’t try and be clever and use yourself as live bait; yes playing the hero is glorious in movies, but it doesn’t work so glamorously in real life
large numbers isn’t a good idea. you want small groups, even if you just branch out from being in a larger group, because if there’s a lot of you you are a bigger target, but don’t then go off and decide to be in groups that are too small in case you get surrounded (in which case, the duct tape and wet suits will come in handy)
food shouldn’t be that hard to come by, most people would have attempted to flee the area straight from their houses and packed what they had, raiding local shops could still be worth it. but remember, know your way in, your way out, and double check there’s nothing in the shop ready to sneak up behind you while you’re reaching up for that tin of beans
half balaclava masks or something similar to cover your lower face while fighting zombies could also be useful, you don;t want to accidentally ingest flying zombie fluids and end up one of them, that’d be a nasty surprise for your group to wake up to (since going solo possibly isn’t a good idea)
and always, ALWAYS, have a way to start a fire on you
I love my followers so you need to protect yourselves.
even better, defeat Pestilence before he can start the virus
This is relevant cause i’m in a zombie movie…
Axes and crowbars are not only perfect for killing zombies, they are also capable of breaking down secured doors.
And never ever ever travel at night. A zombie’s ability to hunt won’t be hindered by darkness, but yours will.
You guys make me scared that this is actually happening now..
Possibly the best Christmas post I have ever seen on Tumblr
It must be December then! I do love all of these though
it doesn’t help that most of us complain about missing lucifer
I have an aniti possession symbol sticker on my laptop and the comments I get because of it are hilarious
I have the anti possession tattoo on my neck and sometimes I purposefully put my hair up when it looks like I’m sitting next to a closed minded, judgmental person.
My pastor told my mother he was concerned for me.